When I made the decision to intern with CRU 4 months ago, I knew that it was an act of obedience. I passed up the chance to work at the church I grew up in, with a youth ministry that I LOVED. But I felt like God had something bigger for me and wanted me to step out of my comfort zone to follow the path He had planned for me. This journey has been amazing. I could never have imagined how it would all come together or how I would be able to raise my support. But the funny thing is...I wasn't supposed to know, or try to figure it out and I didn't do a single bit of the real work, God did.
As Christians, we know that we are supposed to let the Lord take control. But we wonder; what exactly is that supposed to feel like? What does it mean to let God take over? I still don't have a good answer, but I can attest that indeed when we give up control, the Lord will take over and show up in BIG ways.
I had overwhelming doubts, fears, and anxieties. Only a few weeks before my deadline I had barely scraped past 50% of my goal. I remember thinking, "Lord where are you? Why haven't you shown up yet?" In The Message version of the New Testament Paul writes in Philippians 1:6 - "There has never been the slightest doubt in my mind that the God who started this great work in you would keep at it and bring it to a flourishing finish on the very day Christ Jesus appears." Well, while I had doubts about God's ability to come through, he was as confident as ever. God knew all along how this would end, he was just waiting for me to let go and trust him. I had to learn patience, and force myself to search God's heart to better understand his character.
God worked miracles and brought in the majority of my remaining support in just 4 short days. Today I am in awe of the mighty power of our creator. I have learned that while we are anxious and worried, God is patience and confident. While we are angry and hateful, God is loving and sincere. When we cry out in frustration, questioning God's presence, He is right there. God speaks to us in loud, obvious ways, but also in quiet whispers. I have also learned that God has a sense of humor and, is probably laughing at me as I write this, for doubting him all this time.
Although raising support has been one of the most challenging things I have ever done, I have been so excited to see God's hand at work. I get excited when I see the Holy Spirit moving and working in the lives of ministry partners. I love that so many people have a heart and desire to be a part of God's kingdom. God did such big things in such a short time. Just think about what He has planned this next year for the students of Pittsburgh. I am so excited to start the journey.
As the adventure begins, I will head to Valley Forge on Monday for training. Then next Friday, I travel back to Pittsburgh to start the real work! I have no doubts that God has started a good work in Pittsburgh and will bring it to completion.
"Praise God from whom all blessings flow"
No comments:
Post a Comment